Slaves vs Fags

In the past couple of years, the gay kink community has seen the emergence of a new category of submissive, the Fag. While the word is an old one, the way it’s come to be used recently is new. On the surface, the Fag looks a lot like an older category, the Slave. Both are extremely submissive and generally have few limits, both typically go beyond sexual service to include things like domestic chores, both are expected to practice humility toward their superior, both may have an element of financial control. and both are viewed as having no (or only a limited) right to say no. And in the way they used, the two terms are often synonyms (in gay findom, for example, ‘cashfag’ and ‘cashslave’ are generally used interchangeably). So is the Fag simply a new term for the Slave?

While there’s obviously a lot of potential variation in how any two kinksters view themselves, I don’t think a Slave and a Fag are exactly the same thing, although there is a lot of overlap.

Slaves typically are self-consciously involved in BDSM. They often recognize themselves as explicitly engaging in domination and submission with a partner, and their play might include bondage, erotic torture, and other classic elements of BDSM. They have often had formal conversations about their limits, what, if any, rights they accorded, and so on. Fags, in contrast, often engage in elements of power exchange without seeing themselves as practicing BDSM, and they often operate within a vaguer framework in which they and their alpha may not have agreed on anything beyond a general principle that the alpha gets what he wants. They may not be involved with bondage or pain play, for example.

Part of the Alpha/Faggot ideology is usually a sense that the Alpha possesses superior masculinity and that the Faggot is profoundly inferior, unmasculine, or even not quite human by virtue of his defective masculinity. Alphas are often celebrated for stereotypically masculine physical qualities such as height, muscles, athletic ability, intense sexual drive, and the like, while Gags are often physically smaller and less athletic, and they are often (though not inevitably) framed as being more feminine in some way because they are insufficiently masculine. Although a Master/Slave pair might employ such ideology, an imbalance of masculinity is not always a core element of their dynamic. The Slave may be highly masculine but simply feel inspired to submit and serve a man who inspires him in some way. While being a Fag is typically framed as being ‘natural’ or rooted in biology, slavery is sometimes framed as a matter of choice (although certainly many Slaves feel their slavery is an inborn element of their personality).

Because a putative failure of masculinity is often a major element of the Alpha/Fag dynamic, these relationships can often make use of kinks such as chastity, cuckolding, one-sided open relationships, and breeding, which are framed as extensions of the Alpha’s superior sexuality and the Fag’s sexual humiliation. Although these elements can occur in Master/ASlave relationships as well, such a couple might just as easily employ closed relationships and the Master may treat his Slave with respect or consider him a prized possession. Just the term ‘faggot’, which originated as a homophobic insult, demonstrates that humiliation and related ideas are a key element of the Alpha/Faggot dynamic.

Masters are often older their Slaves. The dynamic may emphasize the master’s superior age, income, experience, and sexual prowess. Fags, in contrast, are sometimes older their Alphas. Since Alphas are often celebrated for their virility, they may be college students, athletes and so on, their Fags may be older men who admire their Alpha’s youthful bodies. But obviously, there are older Slaves who serve young Masters and older Alphas who train young Faggots.

Clearly, there are many power-exchange couples who could reasonably frame their dynamic as either Master/Slave or Alpha/Faggot, and in many cases, Masters and Slaves are simply kinksters who came of age before the development of categories of Alpha and Faggot. As with all things in BDSM, so long as everyone is enjoying the dynamic and consents to what’s happening, how they term themselves is mostly a matter of personal choice and what feels right for the couple in question. But I think it’s useful to think about the ways these two dynamics compare when deciding which is right for you.

So what do you think? How would you characterize these two dynamics?